I went to breakfast with my dad this morning. Nothing fancy, just a little mom and pop diner close to our house. This morning was the first morning in the past two days that I haven't felt like bursting into tears.
Over pancakes, we talked about the family. We talked about my Tata, my brothers, uncles and cousins. Then the conversation turned to my nana. Nana Irma died when I was five but I still miss her. I like to imagine what she would be like now, how she would react to the person I've become. I find myself wondering if she would be proud that I'm her granddaughter.
"I don't really have a lot of memories of her," I said. "But I like to think she was a no-nonsense woman. A strong woman, someone who was the rock of the family."
My dad drank his coffee and nodded. "She was a good woman," he said. "If there was something that needed to be done, she didn't make a fuss about it, she just did it."
I suddenly felt very ashamed. I've spent the past few days mourning the past. I've beat myself up over things that I can't change. I've been focusing so much on what needs to be done and how I'm going to accomplish it instead of just doing it. I don't want to be a martyr, I just want to get my stuff done.
I look at my family and it's clear that I come from a strong line of women. From my grandmother to my own mother to my aunts and cousins, I think there is very little the women in my family can't accomplish. I think I possess the strength they all have, I just haven't been using it.
Still, I wish my Nana were alive. I wish I could ask her what she thought when she was my age and if she was happy with her life. I don't think people are ever satisfied with their lives. I don't think the doubts ever go away, it's just a matter of learning to work around it.
That still seems like a pretty raw deal. But there have been millions of people before me who made life work somehow. I just have to get on with myself.
Showing posts with label Familia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Familia. Show all posts
2.11.2009
1.15.2009
January 15, 1992
Well, ladies and gentleman, it seems that yesterday I suffered from what is commonly known as "an overreaction". It can also go by freaking out for no reason, momentarily losing one's shit or just straight up being an unpleasant dickface.
The rest of the day turned out fine. But, what's in the past is in the past and now it's time to focus on the future. What exactly does the future hold today? This guy:
That's right, Tomas, everybody's communal little brother, is entering full blown teenage sassery and turning 17 today. It seems like just yesterday we were making fun of his red hair and telling him we found him in a bathroom when he was young.*
So, in celebration of Tomas' glorious, goo filled entrance into the world exactly 17 years ago, I now present 17 things that make me glad Tomas is around.
17. He knows the cool, teen slang that all the kids are using these days.
16. He entertains me with his high school stories.
15. His hair is awesome. Somehow two Mexican parents gave way to a redhead, which has served him quite well over the years.
14. We stick together during family parties where we don't know anyone.
13. Whilst participating in #14, we also make fun. I love having people to make fun with,
12. He cracks me up during driving lessons.
11. He has given me the gift of knit. As in, the kid taught me how to knit and didn't stab me with a knitting needle when I almost lost my shit over pearling.
10. He's smart, like almost to a freakish degree. I don't think there is any problem Tomas couldn't figure out eventually.
9. He let's me call him "Fatty" even though the nickname doesn't really apply.
8. His fashion sense is pretty rad. Did I mention he KNITS HIS OWN ACCESSORIES?!
7. He owns accessories.
6. Tomas is his own person. He's not afraid to do out of the box things and he never apologizes for it.
5. He's a smart ass.
4. I can share comfortable silences with him.
3. He sings, loudly. Like big, fat lady singing. It's awesome.
2. He is one of the funniest people I've ever met.
1. Because even though we're related and I have to love him, I would still do it anyway.
So, here's to the littlest member of the Montez clan. Happy Birthday, Fatty.
*May or may not have actually been yesterday.
The rest of the day turned out fine. But, what's in the past is in the past and now it's time to focus on the future. What exactly does the future hold today? This guy:
That's right, Tomas, everybody's communal little brother, is entering full blown teenage sassery and turning 17 today. It seems like just yesterday we were making fun of his red hair and telling him we found him in a bathroom when he was young.*
So, in celebration of Tomas' glorious, goo filled entrance into the world exactly 17 years ago, I now present 17 things that make me glad Tomas is around.
17. He knows the cool, teen slang that all the kids are using these days.
16. He entertains me with his high school stories.
15. His hair is awesome. Somehow two Mexican parents gave way to a redhead, which has served him quite well over the years.
14. We stick together during family parties where we don't know anyone.
13. Whilst participating in #14, we also make fun. I love having people to make fun with,
12. He cracks me up during driving lessons.
11. He has given me the gift of knit. As in, the kid taught me how to knit and didn't stab me with a knitting needle when I almost lost my shit over pearling.
10. He's smart, like almost to a freakish degree. I don't think there is any problem Tomas couldn't figure out eventually.
9. He let's me call him "Fatty" even though the nickname doesn't really apply.
8. His fashion sense is pretty rad. Did I mention he KNITS HIS OWN ACCESSORIES?!
7. He owns accessories.
6. Tomas is his own person. He's not afraid to do out of the box things and he never apologizes for it.
5. He's a smart ass.
4. I can share comfortable silences with him.
3. He sings, loudly. Like big, fat lady singing. It's awesome.
2. He is one of the funniest people I've ever met.
1. Because even though we're related and I have to love him, I would still do it anyway.
So, here's to the littlest member of the Montez clan. Happy Birthday, Fatty.
*May or may not have actually been yesterday.
1.05.2009
Never Too Late for 2008
It's only 5 days into 2009 and I don't think it's too late for a holiday update. Even though the holidays are so 2008. Well guess what? I don't follow the general principal of time. I make my own time. That was one of my resolutions in 2009, to make my own time. So now that it's 17:0x o'clock, it's time for a semi-late to the party 2008 in review.
Holiday 1: Christmas
Christmas was amazing...amazingly cold! When it snows in New Mexico, Mother Nature doesn't mess around. She's like, "You stole my land and, y'know what, eff that. Eat snow, ya bastards!" It was freezing. I stepped off the plane and looked a lot like this:
You better believe I was NOT doing lunges. It was so cold, I'm not even positive I could feel my legs.
But I'll tell you something: nothing gets rid of the coldies then some chili. If it's one thing New Mexico knows, it's chili. I had chili with posole, chili with tamales, and I can't be sure, but I may have chased a shot of tequila with a spoonful of yummy, delicious chili. My eating plan went to hell in a handbasket (full of chili).
The highlight of the trip was when my parents took us to Santa Fe. They went to college there and just wanted to show us around. Santa Fe is awesome. It has all these galleries everywhere and everything smells like, well, you know.*
However, if there's one gripe I have with New Mexico, it's the fact that we saw these creepy bronze statues hangin' around. Some were kids, some were animals, and a couple were bears. Now let me say this-- bears scare the shit out of me. I am terrified of them. I don't like statues, paintings or any other sort of bear replicas, but I'm not afraid of them. I'm uncomfortable around them because of what they represent: 600lbs of rage covered in fur. Bears will rip your face off and eat your legs all because you just so happened to walk within 200 feet of their cubs. I didn't see your name written on this forest, you selfish ass bear. It's not like you can outrun them either. They're freakishly fast for being fatties. You can't out climb them or out swim them either because, oh yeah, THEY'RE FREAKISHLY FAST FOR BEING SUCH FATTY McFATTERSONS. It's astonishing and really quite terrifying.
Of course, my family was thoroughly amused and fascinated by these statues. So much so, there was posing involved.
And then this happened:
Family: Look, Karina, a bear! Go stand by it.
Karina: No.
Family: C'mon! It's not a real bear.
Karina: I hate it anyway.
Family: Go on. Pretend like you're punching it in the head.
Karina: What?! No.
Family: C'mon. We'll take a picture and it'll be funny.
Karina:...Fine.
Holiday 2: New Years Eve and New Years Day
Since this was the first year I was legally able to go out and make a fool of myself, I decided to take advantage. And take advantage I did!
Myself, Holly and Crystal
Cousin Nikki and her boyfriend
Crystal, her fiance Brandon, Cousin Stephanie and her boyfriend, Ryan
Nikki was not impressed with my booth dancing. She must not have been using her eyes.
Marcos and Holly
Who likes to rock the party? I like to rock the party!
Now, dear reader, I'd like to tell you about the songs I danced to and the jokes I told. But honestly, I don't remember a lot of the night. I suffered from a common ailment called "selective memory" or what some people like to ruin and call "blacking out". Here's what I do recall. Dancing was involved, as was alcohol and sequins. Bad decisions and laughing were also involved, the latter mostly being at my expense. But y'know what? I had a blast. Not just a regular blast, but a rocket flying, bomb exploding blast. If there's one thing I regret, it's drunk dialing everyone in my phonebook, including Directory Assistance. Oh Directory Assistance, you always take my calls.
Holiday 3: 1st Wedding of 2009
Alright, I realize this isn't a real holiday. But this is my blog and I'll write about what I please! This past Saturday, my cousin Bride got married. I love going to family parties because my family is awesome and on most occasions, alcohol is served. After spending most of New Years Day cuddled in bed watching The Office and my new copy of Rocky Balboa, I vowed that I would stay away from the liquor. Then I heard about this magical place at the wedding reception called "Open Bar". Oh, and what a magical place it was. I had fairy sparkled drinks like prickly pear magaritas, Washington Sour Apples, tequila shots, Negra Modelos, Fat Tires, sips of dirty martinis and the most delicious/disgusting shot called a peanut butter and jelly.
An after effect of hanging out Open Bar was my dancing abilities improved ten fold. I put Tina Turner to shame the way I rolled down the river on that dance floor. This was your dance area? Sorry, I own it now. Oh, what? You're going to play "Cotton Eyed Joe" in an attempt to get all the brown people to clear the area? Psych! You didn't realize I knew how to throw my hat into a ho down. It was amazing.
The always awesome lady cousins. Christina, Anna, Nikki and Stephanie
Nothing beats being fancy and drinking.
Me and my momma
The scary ones, Dad and Armando
The lookers in the family.
The end of 2008 turned out to be a whirlwind of fun. I had so much fun with my friends and family. I am choosing to believe that all the fun I've had in the past few weeks is an indicator of what 2009 is and should be.
So, here's to 2009. It's going to be fine.**
*Hint: CHILI.
**Another one of my resolutions is to rhyme more. I think it's working out really well so far.
Holiday 1: Christmas
Christmas was amazing...amazingly cold! When it snows in New Mexico, Mother Nature doesn't mess around. She's like, "You stole my land and, y'know what, eff that. Eat snow, ya bastards!" It was freezing. I stepped off the plane and looked a lot like this:
You better believe I was NOT doing lunges. It was so cold, I'm not even positive I could feel my legs.
But I'll tell you something: nothing gets rid of the coldies then some chili. If it's one thing New Mexico knows, it's chili. I had chili with posole, chili with tamales, and I can't be sure, but I may have chased a shot of tequila with a spoonful of yummy, delicious chili. My eating plan went to hell in a handbasket (full of chili).
The highlight of the trip was when my parents took us to Santa Fe. They went to college there and just wanted to show us around. Santa Fe is awesome. It has all these galleries everywhere and everything smells like, well, you know.*
However, if there's one gripe I have with New Mexico, it's the fact that we saw these creepy bronze statues hangin' around. Some were kids, some were animals, and a couple were bears. Now let me say this-- bears scare the shit out of me. I am terrified of them. I don't like statues, paintings or any other sort of bear replicas, but I'm not afraid of them. I'm uncomfortable around them because of what they represent: 600lbs of rage covered in fur. Bears will rip your face off and eat your legs all because you just so happened to walk within 200 feet of their cubs. I didn't see your name written on this forest, you selfish ass bear. It's not like you can outrun them either. They're freakishly fast for being fatties. You can't out climb them or out swim them either because, oh yeah, THEY'RE FREAKISHLY FAST FOR BEING SUCH FATTY McFATTERSONS. It's astonishing and really quite terrifying.
Of course, my family was thoroughly amused and fascinated by these statues. So much so, there was posing involved.
And then this happened:
Family: Look, Karina, a bear! Go stand by it.
Karina: No.
Family: C'mon! It's not a real bear.
Karina: I hate it anyway.
Family: Go on. Pretend like you're punching it in the head.
Karina: What?! No.
Family: C'mon. We'll take a picture and it'll be funny.
Karina:...Fine.
Holiday 2: New Years Eve and New Years Day
Since this was the first year I was legally able to go out and make a fool of myself, I decided to take advantage. And take advantage I did!
Myself, Holly and Crystal
Cousin Nikki and her boyfriend
Crystal, her fiance Brandon, Cousin Stephanie and her boyfriend, Ryan
Nikki was not impressed with my booth dancing. She must not have been using her eyes.
Marcos and Holly
Who likes to rock the party? I like to rock the party!
Now, dear reader, I'd like to tell you about the songs I danced to and the jokes I told. But honestly, I don't remember a lot of the night. I suffered from a common ailment called "selective memory" or what some people like to ruin and call "blacking out". Here's what I do recall. Dancing was involved, as was alcohol and sequins. Bad decisions and laughing were also involved, the latter mostly being at my expense. But y'know what? I had a blast. Not just a regular blast, but a rocket flying, bomb exploding blast. If there's one thing I regret, it's drunk dialing everyone in my phonebook, including Directory Assistance. Oh Directory Assistance, you always take my calls.
Holiday 3: 1st Wedding of 2009
Alright, I realize this isn't a real holiday. But this is my blog and I'll write about what I please! This past Saturday, my cousin Bride got married. I love going to family parties because my family is awesome and on most occasions, alcohol is served. After spending most of New Years Day cuddled in bed watching The Office and my new copy of Rocky Balboa, I vowed that I would stay away from the liquor. Then I heard about this magical place at the wedding reception called "Open Bar". Oh, and what a magical place it was. I had fairy sparkled drinks like prickly pear magaritas, Washington Sour Apples, tequila shots, Negra Modelos, Fat Tires, sips of dirty martinis and the most delicious/disgusting shot called a peanut butter and jelly.
An after effect of hanging out Open Bar was my dancing abilities improved ten fold. I put Tina Turner to shame the way I rolled down the river on that dance floor. This was your dance area? Sorry, I own it now. Oh, what? You're going to play "Cotton Eyed Joe" in an attempt to get all the brown people to clear the area? Psych! You didn't realize I knew how to throw my hat into a ho down. It was amazing.
The always awesome lady cousins. Christina, Anna, Nikki and Stephanie
Nothing beats being fancy and drinking.
Me and my momma
The scary ones, Dad and Armando
The lookers in the family.
The end of 2008 turned out to be a whirlwind of fun. I had so much fun with my friends and family. I am choosing to believe that all the fun I've had in the past few weeks is an indicator of what 2009 is and should be.
So, here's to 2009. It's going to be fine.**
*Hint: CHILI.
**Another one of my resolutions is to rhyme more. I think it's working out really well so far.
12.30.2008
Quick (Bor-ing!) Update
Hey, remember when I said that I'd be back sometime this week? Well, that was a lie. I'm not back. In fact, this isn't even me. It's a ghost writer named, uh, Urgle Grue?
It's been a successful holiday, for the most part. I have a ton to write about and lots of pictures to post. Christmas in New Mexico was definitely a lot different than Christmases spent in Arizona. For starters, it was freezing! Oh, and there was some sort of white business all over that I heard the natives refer to as "snow". I don't know that word but I'm told that's what it's called. One cousin even told me you could eat it. Um, what? Crazy New Mexicans.
I'm heading up to Phoenix for New Years to spend it with some of the best, if not the most awesome, people I know. It should make for some good times. I'll post more about it next week. For realsies this time.
It's been a successful holiday, for the most part. I have a ton to write about and lots of pictures to post. Christmas in New Mexico was definitely a lot different than Christmases spent in Arizona. For starters, it was freezing! Oh, and there was some sort of white business all over that I heard the natives refer to as "snow". I don't know that word but I'm told that's what it's called. One cousin even told me you could eat it. Um, what? Crazy New Mexicans.
I'm heading up to Phoenix for New Years to spend it with some of the best, if not the most awesome, people I know. It should make for some good times. I'll post more about it next week. For realsies this time.
12.18.2008
Dirty Christmas
Today, Holly and I took a drive to the mall so I could finish up my Christmas shopping. All was going well, then this happened:
Me: I hate it when people are too southwestern. I get that you like it here, but enough with the kokopellis already.
Holly: What about boot tassles?
Me (confused): Boob tassles?!
Holly: Yes, boob tassles. Except they're southwestern so they're bolero tie boob tassles. And in the middle are kokopellis.
Me: That would be so heavy! It'd make your boobs sag so much that National Geographic would have to film you.
Holly: Like a really dirty native tribe. The Inaprop-Hopis.
After that conversation, the day went from a good day to an AMAZING day. It was the first day I actually felt in the Christmas spirit. After I dropped Holly off I drove home with the windows down and let the wind whip across my face. I looked at the sky and thought, "Good one," to whoever was listening.
Good one, indeed.
Me: I hate it when people are too southwestern. I get that you like it here, but enough with the kokopellis already.
Holly: What about boot tassles?
Me (confused): Boob tassles?!
Holly: Yes, boob tassles. Except they're southwestern so they're bolero tie boob tassles. And in the middle are kokopellis.
Me: That would be so heavy! It'd make your boobs sag so much that National Geographic would have to film you.
Holly: Like a really dirty native tribe. The Inaprop-Hopis.
After that conversation, the day went from a good day to an AMAZING day. It was the first day I actually felt in the Christmas spirit. After I dropped Holly off I drove home with the windows down and let the wind whip across my face. I looked at the sky and thought, "Good one," to whoever was listening.
Good one, indeed.
12.17.2008
Dating the 10-year-old way
Tonight I was going to blog about my Christmas shopping, IHOPing, gym going and other general -ings, but the powers that be (read: my sister in law Holly) is making me entertain her. I AM NOT A MACHINE! So I'm doing what any other sane, rational person would do: I'm writing about our conversation in the blog because that way I kill two birds with one stone. Win-win.
Turns out, writing and talking are hard to do at the same time. I'm writing right now and she's humming the Jeopardy theme song. New subject.
I went to Target tonight to get my present on. Because everyone knows that Christmas is all about going broke buying people things they kinda, sorta want. But I digress. I only had one goal in mind: to buy my cousin/goddaughter something awesome. When I was little, I judged people solely on how good their presents were. There's always the family member who gets you socks or, god forbid, underwear. You pull out a pair of granny panties in front of everyone one time and suddenly it's "Grandma Karina" this and "knit me some socks" that. But Christmas was always saved by the cool family member who got you the newest toy, an amazingly warm sweater or pretty much anything with flashing lights. I want to be that person for my goddaughter. I am not above bribing kids to like me.
So I'm perusing the toy aisle asking myself, "What did I like when I was ten?" Now there's a question. I can't even remember what I liked a month ago, let alone eleven years ago. I end up in the board game aisle, awe struck and overwhelmed.
"I know, I'll get her Uno," I thought. "That way everyone can play and enjoy the game."
Then I looked to the left and saw Twister. "That might be fun," I thought. "She'll get a little exercise and learn about sexual tension when she plays with her friends."
Then I looked to the right and I saw it. A High School Musical Mystery Dating Game. I couldn't take my eyes off it. When I was a tween, I used to have a Mystery Dating Game, except it wasn't High School Musical. It was from a little show I like to call Saved by the Bell. That's right. I, like everyone else in 1993, was not immune to the curly haired mullet that graced Mario Lopez's pre-pubescent face.
AC Slater showed up on screen and it was like, "I'll AC your slater*."
But I remember loving that game. I was so hip. I was totally with the times. As I stared down High School Musical Dating Game, I knew that was the one. So I bought it and brought it home. And now I'm having second thoughts. The Mystery Dating Game was awesome when I was 10, but ten years later it's just embarrassing. Furthermore, why should 10-year-olds be worrying about dating? And just why is Zac Efron staring at me so intensely? Is there something on my face?
I don't know that I feel comfortable about him staring at my 10-year-old cousin so, lustily.
So, the Mystery Dating Game sits on the chair across from me. Zac Efron's weird kidnapper face stares at me as if to say, "You know you want to date me. C'mon, just roll a 6 or an 8 and we can make-believe date all night long." No. No I don't want to do any of those things. But Dani might. So, I think I'll keep it.
After all, everyone needs an Aunt Tina.
*My sexual innuendos don't have to make sense.
Turns out, writing and talking are hard to do at the same time. I'm writing right now and she's humming the Jeopardy theme song. New subject.
I went to Target tonight to get my present on. Because everyone knows that Christmas is all about going broke buying people things they kinda, sorta want. But I digress. I only had one goal in mind: to buy my cousin/goddaughter something awesome. When I was little, I judged people solely on how good their presents were. There's always the family member who gets you socks or, god forbid, underwear. You pull out a pair of granny panties in front of everyone one time and suddenly it's "Grandma Karina" this and "knit me some socks" that. But Christmas was always saved by the cool family member who got you the newest toy, an amazingly warm sweater or pretty much anything with flashing lights. I want to be that person for my goddaughter. I am not above bribing kids to like me.
So I'm perusing the toy aisle asking myself, "What did I like when I was ten?" Now there's a question. I can't even remember what I liked a month ago, let alone eleven years ago. I end up in the board game aisle, awe struck and overwhelmed.
"I know, I'll get her Uno," I thought. "That way everyone can play and enjoy the game."
Then I looked to the left and saw Twister. "That might be fun," I thought. "She'll get a little exercise and learn about sexual tension when she plays with her friends."
Then I looked to the right and I saw it. A High School Musical Mystery Dating Game. I couldn't take my eyes off it. When I was a tween, I used to have a Mystery Dating Game, except it wasn't High School Musical. It was from a little show I like to call Saved by the Bell. That's right. I, like everyone else in 1993, was not immune to the curly haired mullet that graced Mario Lopez's pre-pubescent face.
AC Slater showed up on screen and it was like, "I'll AC your slater*."
But I remember loving that game. I was so hip. I was totally with the times. As I stared down High School Musical Dating Game, I knew that was the one. So I bought it and brought it home. And now I'm having second thoughts. The Mystery Dating Game was awesome when I was 10, but ten years later it's just embarrassing. Furthermore, why should 10-year-olds be worrying about dating? And just why is Zac Efron staring at me so intensely? Is there something on my face?
I don't know that I feel comfortable about him staring at my 10-year-old cousin so, lustily.
So, the Mystery Dating Game sits on the chair across from me. Zac Efron's weird kidnapper face stares at me as if to say, "You know you want to date me. C'mon, just roll a 6 or an 8 and we can make-believe date all night long." No. No I don't want to do any of those things. But Dani might. So, I think I'll keep it.
After all, everyone needs an Aunt Tina.
*My sexual innuendos don't have to make sense.
11.26.2008
Thanksgiving up in here
It's Thanksgiving! Well, almost. Some of us still have our day jobs, y'know. We can't all just take the day before a holiday off and go galavanting around town with the top to the car down and being fun and fancy free. And by all that, I mean that I have exactly 13 minutes left at work so this is gonna be a quick one.
I hope everyone has a fun and super delicious day tomorrow. I'll be going to my uncle's house in Queen Creek and hanging out with my family, all 159 of them. My uncle makes the best food I've ever had the pleasure of putting in my mouth.* Don't believe me? Well check this: he likes to wrap things in bacon. Oh, you want some shrimp? How about shrimp with a bacon blanket. What's that? You want some zuchinni? You know what you make that zuchinni dance in your mouth? A nice strip of bacon. Ok, so maybe it sounds gross when I talk about it here but you get the picture.
I'm off! And since I'm too lazy to Google a picture of a turkey, here's a fancy picture of the Northern Lights that someone at work sent me.
Pretty!
*I don't have time for a "that's what she said" reference, but you get the point.
I hope everyone has a fun and super delicious day tomorrow. I'll be going to my uncle's house in Queen Creek and hanging out with my family, all 159 of them. My uncle makes the best food I've ever had the pleasure of putting in my mouth.* Don't believe me? Well check this: he likes to wrap things in bacon. Oh, you want some shrimp? How about shrimp with a bacon blanket. What's that? You want some zuchinni? You know what you make that zuchinni dance in your mouth? A nice strip of bacon. Ok, so maybe it sounds gross when I talk about it here but you get the picture.
I'm off! And since I'm too lazy to Google a picture of a turkey, here's a fancy picture of the Northern Lights that someone at work sent me.
Pretty!
*I don't have time for a "that's what she said" reference, but you get the point.
11.17.2008
EnV2, will you marry me and commit to a lifetime of good reception?
I forgot my phone at home today. I feel cut off from the world. Everytime I forget my phone (which believe me, isn't often), I get really stressed out and anxious. What if someone really imporant is trying to call me? What if I'm missing out on some hilarious text from a friend? What if I've won something and they're calling to let me know but I'M NOT THERE TO ANSWER?!
My skin gets all goosebumpy and my voice gets really high pitched. I've been trying to mentally teleport my phone to my office building all morning. So far, no go. Damn it, this is why I need to be enrolled in Hogwarts instead of lame, no magic college. I could apparate anything in a matter of seconds. But no, I'm enrolled in learning-through-boring-textbooks-and-lectures-instead-of-flying-around-on-a-broomstick-and-hanging-out-with-Dumbledore college. Effing muggles, man.
Aside from missing my one true love (I'm looking at you, Verizon EnV 2), I'm feeling better. The weekend did me well. It was a weekend long birthday celebration of the awesome blossom that is Marcos, my older, cooler brother. Drinks were served, vomit was plentiful, burgers were grilled and fun was had. I just found my camera today and let me tell you, that bad boy went on an adventure this weekend. So now there's photo documentation of all the drunken, obnoxious antics. Great. Perhaps I'll get around to posting them later. If I remember. Maybe.*
*Maybe not. My ego is still pretty bruised on account of me embarassing myself. I was all up on that shorty like, "Wassup yo?" and she was all, "You don't know 20 different ways to make me call you Big Poppa," cause I don't, yo.**
**What?
My skin gets all goosebumpy and my voice gets really high pitched. I've been trying to mentally teleport my phone to my office building all morning. So far, no go. Damn it, this is why I need to be enrolled in Hogwarts instead of lame, no magic college. I could apparate anything in a matter of seconds. But no, I'm enrolled in learning-through-boring-textbooks-and-lectures-instead-of-flying-around-on-a-broomstick-and-hanging-out-with-Dumbledore college. Effing muggles, man.
Aside from missing my one true love (I'm looking at you, Verizon EnV 2), I'm feeling better. The weekend did me well. It was a weekend long birthday celebration of the awesome blossom that is Marcos, my older, cooler brother. Drinks were served, vomit was plentiful, burgers were grilled and fun was had. I just found my camera today and let me tell you, that bad boy went on an adventure this weekend. So now there's photo documentation of all the drunken, obnoxious antics. Great. Perhaps I'll get around to posting them later. If I remember. Maybe.*
*Maybe not. My ego is still pretty bruised on account of me embarassing myself. I was all up on that shorty like, "Wassup yo?" and she was all, "You don't know 20 different ways to make me call you Big Poppa," cause I don't, yo.**
**What?
11.02.2008
I'll show you some Steps of Knowledge
Whew, another Halloween down the pipeline! Verdict: success. As promised, here's what I looked like as a Blue Barracuda.
Blue Barracuda was the best team from Legends of the Hidden Temple. Everyone knows it. So much so, that during our bar hopping we ran into another Blue Barracuda. Who knew so many former LOTHT fans liked to discover their very own Temple of Vodka on a Friday night.
The rest of the group looked great. Don't believe me? Don't be silly. Check 'em out.
Marcos as Period Pants and Holly as an 80s fitness instructor.
Crystal, my sister-in-law-in-law, as a Playboy Bunny and Brandon, her fiance, as Hef.
Daniela being Risky Business.
When I tried on the Risky Business glasses, it looked like I was blind. And have carpal tunnel. So pretty much exactly what I was going for.
The ladies.
I have to be honest, most of the ladies we saw looked scandalous. Daniela was not the only one showin' off the risky business. Just by wearing jeans and a t-shirt, I felt way overdressed. We saw a couple girls wearing only underwear and corsets and one girl who was just in a bra and a small piece of fabric trying to masquerade itself as a skirt. Ladies, I realize Halloween is code for "vaginas dress like sluts". I get it and I've made peace with it. I'll even go so far as to say that some of the slutty fire fighters, slutty policewomen, slutty Dorothys and even that one slutty witch looked alright. But c'mon, wearing your underwear and putting animal ears on is just lazy. You aren't even trying. I mean, at least the slutty (insert job here) had some sort of idea what they wanted to be, even if they got it terribly, inappropriately wrong. Ladies, we're better than that. We're much more creative than that. And if you're not, then at least don't let the drunken Tin Man in the corner touch your yellow brick road. It's just ooky.
Hope you all had a good Halloween! Now onto November.
Blue Barracuda was the best team from Legends of the Hidden Temple. Everyone knows it. So much so, that during our bar hopping we ran into another Blue Barracuda. Who knew so many former LOTHT fans liked to discover their very own Temple of Vodka on a Friday night.
The rest of the group looked great. Don't believe me? Don't be silly. Check 'em out.
Marcos as Period Pants and Holly as an 80s fitness instructor.
Crystal, my sister-in-law-in-law, as a Playboy Bunny and Brandon, her fiance, as Hef.
Daniela being Risky Business.
When I tried on the Risky Business glasses, it looked like I was blind. And have carpal tunnel. So pretty much exactly what I was going for.
The ladies.
I have to be honest, most of the ladies we saw looked scandalous. Daniela was not the only one showin' off the risky business. Just by wearing jeans and a t-shirt, I felt way overdressed. We saw a couple girls wearing only underwear and corsets and one girl who was just in a bra and a small piece of fabric trying to masquerade itself as a skirt. Ladies, I realize Halloween is code for "vaginas dress like sluts". I get it and I've made peace with it. I'll even go so far as to say that some of the slutty fire fighters, slutty policewomen, slutty Dorothys and even that one slutty witch looked alright. But c'mon, wearing your underwear and putting animal ears on is just lazy. You aren't even trying. I mean, at least the slutty (insert job here) had some sort of idea what they wanted to be, even if they got it terribly, inappropriately wrong. Ladies, we're better than that. We're much more creative than that. And if you're not, then at least don't let the drunken Tin Man in the corner touch your yellow brick road. It's just ooky.
Hope you all had a good Halloween! Now onto November.
10.27.2008
Fear Fest '08
Whew! What a weekend. More about that in just a minute, but before I dive into that, I'd like to take this opportunity to say how much I love AMC. Yes, that's AMC as in the TV channel. Today I woke up and wasn't feeling so hot, so I called in sick and curled up on my couch with a million pillows and AMC's Fear Fest '08. It's all horror movies, all day until Halloween is over. Yesterday I watched no less than 5 horror movies, including one so amusingly titled The Midnight Meat Train (note: it does involve actual meat). This morning, I have taken in The Omen II, The Omen III and I'm currently in the middle of An American Werewolf in London. I literally haven't left my couch all morning. Not even to shower or eat or anything. I don't know if I should be proud of that or not (probably not).
Anyway, I'm beginning to not feel so much like a pod person, so I think my movie marathon will last only for today. Tomorrow I'll go back to joining the ranks of the real world.
Which reminds me, I had an excellent weekend! On Friday an old pal from Phoenix came to hang out and on Saturday we went up to Phoenix for my uncle's wedding. It's hard to watch movies and blog at the same time, so here are some choice pictures from the weekend to keep you entertained whilst I get my scary movie on.
Nothing beats impromptu car photo shoots. Especially at 2 in the morning in line at Viva Burrito.
We did not know those people in the car. Serious.
Mom and Uncle Mario, the groom.
Myself and the Escalante ladies.
My gorgeous cousins and sister-in-law.
I'm not going to lie to you; I didn't know what half of that business on my plate was. But I ate it. I ate it and I'm not even sorry. Which just goes to show you that you don't have to know what you're putting in your mouth to have it be delicious.
Austin, Imy and Tomas. My younger, but not so little anymore, cousins and brother.
Ugh, I hate the bouquet toss. Maybe it's cause I'm a single girl and I'm forced to recognize that in front of a bunch of strangers I don't know. My strategy for every bouquet toss is to hang out in the back with a drink, as clearly evidenced in this photo.
Cuttin' a rug with the bride.
The bride and groom.
Well I hope you're all happy. Now I have no idea what's happening in my scary movie. Although it's probably not all that difficult to figure out. Oh look, he's turning into a werewolf. Good, now I'm caught up.
Anyway, I'm beginning to not feel so much like a pod person, so I think my movie marathon will last only for today. Tomorrow I'll go back to joining the ranks of the real world.
Which reminds me, I had an excellent weekend! On Friday an old pal from Phoenix came to hang out and on Saturday we went up to Phoenix for my uncle's wedding. It's hard to watch movies and blog at the same time, so here are some choice pictures from the weekend to keep you entertained whilst I get my scary movie on.
Nothing beats impromptu car photo shoots. Especially at 2 in the morning in line at Viva Burrito.
We did not know those people in the car. Serious.
Mom and Uncle Mario, the groom.
Myself and the Escalante ladies.
My gorgeous cousins and sister-in-law.
I'm not going to lie to you; I didn't know what half of that business on my plate was. But I ate it. I ate it and I'm not even sorry. Which just goes to show you that you don't have to know what you're putting in your mouth to have it be delicious.
Austin, Imy and Tomas. My younger, but not so little anymore, cousins and brother.
Ugh, I hate the bouquet toss. Maybe it's cause I'm a single girl and I'm forced to recognize that in front of a bunch of strangers I don't know. My strategy for every bouquet toss is to hang out in the back with a drink, as clearly evidenced in this photo.
Cuttin' a rug with the bride.
The bride and groom.
Well I hope you're all happy. Now I have no idea what's happening in my scary movie. Although it's probably not all that difficult to figure out. Oh look, he's turning into a werewolf. Good, now I'm caught up.
10.06.2008
Weekend Shenanigans
I realize it's not the weekend anymore. I was busy and didn't have time (read: was too lazy) to blog. What was I doing? I'm glad you asked (read: get ready for this week's blog post).
Friday
I should start by saying that I don't do girly things. I was raised with brothers and even my girl cousins were alway a little tomboyish. I don't do facials, I don't really get together with my girlfriends and watch "Sex and the City" and I'm not really one to paint nails or do make-up together with my lady pals. Yet on Friday evening, I pretty much did all of those things. Ria (of my Gossip Girl/OTH post fame) invited me over to watch movies and do facials. In the spirit of trying new things, I agreed. Here is what happened:
Looks like a good night, right? Then this happened:
I looked like a ghost. My face was whiter than my shirt and I'm pretty sure I scared myself by looking in the mirror at least once (read: three times).
Ria was having way more fun than me.
Saturday
Someone in my office told me about Oktoberfest. Since I've turned 21, I really want to go to things like this just to prove that I can. It's really weird, but I get a tremendous amount of joy when someone asks me for my ID. It's like, "Suck it, I can totally drink." I'm trying to tone down my looks of satisfaction.
I'd like to take a second to discuss the food situation. This Oktoberfest felt a little like the fair. There were booths where you could get food and beer, and then seperate booths where you could buy things or play games. Everyone was filling their bellies with beer and food, and we saw this guy.
I don't get people and their need to consume huge pieces of meat. But this guy, this guy was classic and not to mention, very enthused about devouring that baby thigh. Then Holly and I decided we'd really like pickles. You know, those gigantic ones that only taste good when you're walking around in public, suckling them and generally looking really inappropriate. We waited a ridiculous amount of time in a really long line, only to discover that we're really stupid and there were plenty of stands with pickles that did not have a line the size of Germany. We got our pickles, and some of us were less pleased than others.
Love at first site.
This picture was mostly taken to illustrate the classiness of the evening. If posing with kettle corn next to empty kegs of Coors Light doesn't scream sophistication, I don't know what does.
The rest of the weekend was great too. Hamlet in the park, watching movies, being lazy and late night drinking with friends made it a great weekend. Sometimes I forget how awesome my friends are and then weekends like this come and I'm like, "Oh yeah, this is why I continue to know these people." Duh.
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