Valentine's Aftermath

I now know it is possible to spend an entire day unconscious.

Plan Drink Face Off went off without a hitch. Some friends and I headed to a hip kids bar downtown. It was a blast. I drank, I danced, I shit talked and I laughed a ridiculous amount. It was like the perfect storm of awesome. Someone get George Clooney on the phone, I have a sequel idea to pitch.

The result of having such a fun night is waking up feeling like someone punched my head and dumped a trash can in my mouth. I stumbled into the house this morning at 8 a.m. and proceeded to take off my pants and immediately fall asleep for THE ENTIRE DAY.

Well, that's not technically true. I woke up long enough to do two things:

Eat tacos,


and watch zombie movies.


Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to turn in for the night. At 7:37. Score.

In A Nutshell

Things have been hectic. Not in a bad way, mind you, but there are times when it feels like the earth is spinning way too fast and I can't seem to catch up. This morning I was a little late to work and felt really rushed. I had so much on my plate. Install my new computer, file months worth of neglected files, work on a project I'd been putting off. Catching up was the name of the game.

I started to unload some of the contents of my purse that I brought specifically for work. Some snacks, a book, chapstick, things like that. I looked at the way I had laid them out and realized that these few things could represent what my life has been about for the past few days.



The new year is a great jumping off point for dieters. Well, it would be, but I'm not a dieter. I eat whatever I want, just in limited amounts. I've been trying to watch what I shove into my mouth* so I can keep myself on track. Watching what I eat is important to me, almost as important as say, oh, zombies.

I think I've made it pretty clear how I feel about the undead. Sure, zombies are fascinating (as is this book), but it's not just them I'm fascinated with. I love the idea of being able to say peace out to the real world and focus on whatever I want to. Be it zombies or the awesome DVDs that were bestowed upon me by "Santa", I've been enjoying being able to check out from real life whenever I feel like it. I won't be able to do that once school starts (barf), but until then, I plan on escaping into the zombie apocalypse, the world of Rocky Balboa or Scranton, Pennsylvania as often as I can. That is, when I'm not mini-trampolining.** Because let's face it, sometimes made up worlds are way better than the one I live in. Take that, Earth.


*Yes, that IS what she said. I heard it with my own ears. She's such a pervert.
**Sweet God, mini-trampolining is the best exercise ever! More tomorrow.

Backup Plan

Today I feel like this:



Which sucks for two reasons. The first of which being that feeling like I resemble a 50 foot tall dinosaur doesn't quite give me the self-esteem boost I'm looking for. The second reason being that if I were going to be any monster, I want to be a zombie. That's right. I want to be a rotted, green, eyeball missing, people eating zombie.

I'd make a good zombie because it'd be the easiest profession* ever. Their only goal in life, er, un-life, is to eat. Granted, what they eat is human flesh, but that's just a small price to pay to be a member of the everlasting un-dead party. All my worries about school, work, social standing and self-esteem would be gone because I'd be dead and wouldn't care. The only thing Zombie Karina would care about is eating and trying not to trip over my decomposing peers. My estimation of what a day would be like in the life of a zombie would go a little something like this:

7 a.m.- Wander around looking for food.
8 a.m.- Wander around looking for food.
9 a.m.- Wander around looking for food.
10 a.m. -Wander around looking for food.
11 a.m.-3 p.m. - Groan.
4 p.m.- Wander around looking for food.
5 p.m.- Wander around looking for food.
6 p.m. - Stare at something off in the distance; wonder to myself if it's food.

I think you get the idea. If my plans to be a professional, well educated and well adjusted adult doesn't work out, I plan on becoming a zombie. So if in the distant future you see me wandering around, dead with half my arm missing, you'll know that behind my cold, lifeless eyes I'm smiling. But, uh, you probably don't want to get too close.


*This is of course assuming that being a zombie is on scale with having a full time job. You would have to have qualifications like, "Can eat up to 10 pounds of brain" and "Has 2+ years experience in being un-dead" and "willing to work holidays, weekends and dark, foggy nights".

Northern A to the Z

This past weekend the M to the Z clan packed our bags and drove to Sedona. I had all these witty stories but I don't really feel like writing about it anymore. So, to sum up, this is everything that happened:

1. Watched Austin play football. It was awesome. Austin, who is my not so little younger cousin, cleaned up. He's #1, both literally and figuratively.

2. Ate at a Sizzler

I'm serious when I say I really did not know Sizzlers were in existence anymore. Ugh, buffets are gross unless it involves breakfast or Chinese. There were some upset tummys that evening in Sedona.

3. Drank at the hotel bar with a dozen stuffed game animals.

4. Partook in some "haunted eating" in Jerome, AZ

Now I will say this: I like haunted things. Haunted houses, hotels, inns, corn mazes and even the occasional hamgurger are all very appealing things. I am the biggest baby when I'm actually at said haunted places, but I still really like to go. So when someone mentioned the eating establishment "The Haunted Hamburger", obviously I was game. Hey, I thought. Maybe I'll see a ghost or if I'm really lucky, a zombie. Nope.

What the hell?! There were no ghosts or zombies anywhere in sight. I wasn't expecting bleeding walls or anything, but I don't think it's too much to ask for a poltergeist to throw some dishes around or my burger to moan. Especially when I realized that the H.H. has help from the DEAD AND THE UNDEAD.

Um, last I checked the undead were awesome. As far as being haunted goes, this place was not so awesome. But I'll forgive the H.H. because my veggie burger was delicious, even if it didn't contain the souls of the recently deceased. I guess I can settle for that.